World Autism Awareness Week 2021...
I still continue to beat myself over it. I wish I did. It took twelve and a bit years, before Tim was finally diagnosed with autism. I feel disappointed why it wasn't picked up while Tim was at nursery and then school. To be honest he had the most miserable time, in his first four years in first primary school, then one year in his second school and then dropped out of school in year 5, until finally, with the help of my local MP Keir Stammer, the right school came along. Tim's last year in primary school was his most enjoyable experience. An Education Health and Care plan was finally completed before he entered year 7.
I was happy and relieved in a way, the moment finally came, Tim felt loved and understood by his peers. He was encouraged to develop in all the things he loved doing with plenty of help. He learnt to tinker and take piano seriously, enjoyed art and making things. Slowly as his confidence grew, he began to read more and write. Still struggled with numeracy but managed to learn at his own pace. His favorite time was playtime. He enjoyed climbing frames with a few friends from class and particularly school outings with Mummy.
Tim's now 14. Since his diagnosis, he now seems more accepting of himself. He is more settled at home and school, because of all the right support and encouragement he continues to receive. He has now found things he particularly enjoys. Both environments continue to be carefully molded to Tim's needs and it's working.
I look back and thought about particular memories which stood out about Tim. I kind of continue to beat myself over it from time to time.
Well...
Tim's behavior should of been alarm bells along the way. Off course we didn't know and what about the professionals who knew Tim?
This is why I feel encouraged, as we all move into the future, why people all around the world, should know about autism and learn about the condition. We should share our own personal experiences about autism, just like the woman, I met who sat in front of me on the bus. At the time Tim was diagnosed with ADHD. I remember speaking about it with my daughter while Tim was right at the front of the bus behind the driver. My angel, this is what I call this woman. "Your son reminds me a lot of my son," she said. "How old is he?" "He is 10 years old." "He doesn't have ADHD. Sorry, I overheard your conversation." He is spinning, pacing back and forth repeatedly and repetitive two words continuously just like my son, when he was your son's age. I can tell he has Autism. You should take him to your GP to push for a diagnosis." I look back that moment and feel so grateful what she did for my son at the time. I hope one day I could do the same to help someone out there. Immediately I went home and read about autism. The more I read about it, the more I felt encouraged to book an appointment with my GP. I needed to do it for Tim. This time I didn't wanted to discuss about Tim's bad behavior. I was adamant Autism was causing my son to be the way he was. My husband in particularly was affected and worried about Tim. We both questioned ourselves...
Why? Why is Tim so different?
What's wrong with this boy? my husband always use to say.
We didn't know at the time how to help Tim. What were we doing wrong?
We just couldn't understand why our son was so incredibly sensitive, to the point he became so frustrated and angry at particular things, which led to continuous meltdowns at home and school. While he was at school in year 4, Tim didn't like to be punished for misbehaving badly. Being punished was Tim's worst nightmare. But why Mummy! I didn't do it!
He felt he was misunderstood for wanting to do things so differently, he wasn't allowed to do. Tim's behavior was so extreme, he just didn't wanted to go to school anymore.
He was a boy who had so much energy and who was always curious about particularly things he enjoyed...
TO BE CONTINUED...
TIM'S JOURNEY/WRITTEN BY IRENE KATHERINE
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